5:59am

So many things to blog about. It has been days since I had a chance to sit at my iMac and jot down my thoughts. Do I compose another list? Do I recount my day? Share with you the lastest new things my children have done? Or tell you why I haven't been able to blog at will? I'm pretty tired tonight, so here is what I have decided:

Why I haven't been able to blog at will: I am sleep deprived. I know, I already blogged about that a few weeks ago. But, just for the record... I am still sleep deprived. My son still likes to get his snuggle on at 11pm, 2am and sometime between 4 and 5am. God help us all if I can't get him back to sleep after the last one. If he wakes close to 5am I can be pretty sure he's up for the day. I try to convince him that his crib is a cool place to hang out until 6am, but he rarely makes it that far. He likes to do his vocal exercises as the sun comes up, which usually wakes up my daughter. At that point the kids are all in my room and I let my husband take over. They gently nudge him until he gets up and takes everyone downstairs for breakfast. At that point I sneak into my son's room and grab another hour of sleep on the twin bed. It is the best hour of sleep I get all night because Daddy is taking care of the babies and I know that no one will need me for that one precious hour.

Ahh, 5:59am.

first of many lists

just a photo of how I spend most of my day

I have liked making lists for as long as I can remember. In fact, in my very first journal, a nine year old me made a list of what I liked to, and make lists was number one. So, here is the first list on my first blog:

things I wake up hoping to do every day, but never get around to doing

1. Read something other than an article in a Parenting magazine

2. Make a nutritious meal for myself and eat it slowly

3. Shop for something pretty for myself

4. Scrub down the shower in my bathroom

5. Convince my daughter to spend quality time on her potty

6. Call up a friend and see how they are doing

7. Take yoga class, or just stretch for a few minutes, or take a few cleansing breaths

8. Go to bed early

9. Decorate my son's room so it looks more like a nursery and less like a red room with a crib in it

10. Give my husband some good lovin'

Her first story

My daughter has a rich imagination. She loves to play with her figurines, miniature dolls and plastic animals. And when they aren't around she plays with "Pee Pee" and "Pee Pee." Those are the names of her spiders, otherwise known as, her hands. Her fingers are very agile spider legs and the two "Pee Pees" have been running all over the furniture and walls of our townhouse. I love to see her in action when she is makin' stuff up.

The first story she made up on her own and told my husband and I was right around her second birthday and it goes like this: "One day, the little girl lived, and loved peanuts. Then a big bear came. She fell down. They lived happily ever after. The end." A few months later she added this: "One day, the little girl lived, and loved peanuts. Then a big bear came and took the peanuts. She fell down and had to get more at the store. They lived happily ever after. The end." I really like it when she tells this to the two "Pee Pees." They get a big kick out of it.

doody balls

This is a photo of the spot where the "incident" took place.

My daughter has been asking to go to Grandpa's house to go swimming for several days now. With my husband at work all day and evening today, I gave Dad a call to see if he wanted some company. Yippee! He's home and we are set to meet for lunch and a swim. Lunch was great (grilled cheese sandwiches) and my daughter AND my 7 month old son had a great time in the pool. As we are all eating our drumstick icecream cones the phone rings. It's Grandma. She wants to see us (and the new car). We decide to stay for dinner. She arrives about 5pm and the kids are starting to get cranky from their fun day with no nap. We sit down to eat and my daughter eats all of her pasta wheels and sauce. We are all still eating when she jumps up from the table and annouces that she's done. Her brother is sitting in the play area (pictured above) chewing on a piece of the play mat. We begin to attempt having an adult conversation now that my daughter has stopped asking us to tell her the story of Goldie Locks and the Three Bears while she eats. Something catches my eye and I turn toward the play area to see that my daughter has pulled her skirt off and is starting to pull down her pull-ups. "Honey, we don't pull down our pull-ups in the..." Just then she pulls them down and kicks them toward her brother. I leap from the table and the whole thing seems to play out in slow motion. As her diaper is flying across the room, so are little brown balls of doody. Across the playmat, over her brother's head, under the coffee table. I grab a paper towel and go doody hunting. I am pretty sure I have all the smelly pellets and put them in a plastic bag. Then I put the diaper in the bag and reach for her skirt. As I lift it up a huge doody ball falls out of it with a thump. I screamed and reached back in the bag for the paper towel to pick it up with. I made my way back to the table to finish my meal. My parents didn't quite no what to say. My Dad took bite of his meatball and said, "That didn't ruin my appetite."

the new car

While looking for a parking spot at my daughter's school today we counted 10 Honda Odessey mini vans. Ahh, we finally fit in. We have crossed over to the land of oversized cars. We are a family of four and have convinced ourselves that we simply must have more room while tooling around town. And we went for the model WITH the DVD player. Decadent. Although, I am sure it will be many months, possibly years before I can view any disc above a G rating. The DVD is becoming my daughter's crack. She'll do anything for it. Getting her to leave what ever fun she is having outside of the car for a fix is easy. It's getting her to get out of the car that has become the challenge. I usually have to agree to bring her disc inside the house so she can continue using. I know there are some mothers out there reading this and shaking their heads. And to them I pose this question: "when you were a kid, didn't you think it would be THE COOLEST THING EVER to have a TV in your car?"

it happened

One of my worst fears has been realized. My daughter has lost her pink blankie, aka, her "lovey" or "transitional object". She has had this blanket since she was born and it was her favorite from early infancy. She chose it above all other blankies to be the one she would sleep with every night. And later, she chose it to be the thing to comfort her when she was at school, away from us. She asks for it when she is scared, confused, tired or any time she needs a little comforting. Today my husband took her to school, and as usual, pink blankie was in her backpack. When he picked her up he assumed it was still in her backpack. Tonight, when I was getting her ready for bed I couldn't find it. I called him at work and asked where it was. Silence. "A cold chill just ran through me," he said. "Tell me it's in her backpack." I told him it wasn't. Silence. "It must be at school," he said. Silence. We both knew what kind of night I was in for. I hung up and ran upstairs to my MAC. I had to find another one. Google search: pink baby blanket. Lots of sites. Scanned through them but nothing resembled the pink cotton, satin trimmed floral print blankie I needed. If only I had looked closer at the label on that thing. Why hadn't I done that months ago? I should have read the label and ordered at least one more and kept it in the closet so that when this day came I would be prepared. I felt like such a failure. I went back downstairs to my daughter who was whatching POOH'S HEPHALUMP movie for the third time today. I had to put it on to delay the inevitable. If I was lucky, she might even fall asleep whatching it and I could carry her up to her bed without her waking and wailing for her pink blankie. It was past her bedtime now. She was lying on the floor gazing at the television screen. "Hi Sweetie," I said with an overcompensating smile. She turned to me and said simply, "I want my cold water and my pink blankie." Here we go. Deep breath, "I'll get you your water, but I think you left your blankie at school today." Her eyebrows lowered. Silence. I walked up to the kitchen and brought her sippy cup down to her. "Let's go to bed and read stories," I said, as if nothing was wrong. "I want my pink blankie." Silence. "Sweetie, did you leave your blankie at school today?" She looked at me for a moment and answered, "Nang." (Nang is her word for yes) "Okay, then we'll have to go get it tomorrow." She nodded and then asked me to pick her up and make her fly like a bird to her bedroom. We told stories and listened to Princess Songs. Then I told her I had to clean up downstairs and that I would check on her later. She told me to sing WHISTLE WHILE YOU WORK like Snow White does when she cleans. We both had a good laugh over that one and I told her I would. And that was it. She rolled over and went to sleep.

tantrum forces ballet shoe off left foot

img1343Feb 2005
Originally uploaded by rangerrina.

UP LATE

It's almost 11pm and I had the opportunity to go to bed about an hour ago. My six month old son will be up soon and who knows how long it will take to get him back to sleep. He has started teething and is back to waking up 2 to 3 times during the night. I have never been so exhausted in my life. During the day he is pretty good - naps well. But, my 2 1/2 year old daughter doesn't nap well. She might nap every other day. It could be any time during the day, anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours. And it NEVER sincs up with my son, so they are never asleep at the same time. Thus, I cannot nap. It hurts! I know I will sleep through the night again someday, but someday feels so so far off that it gives me no comfort. So, what do I do? Stay up late and "blog!" Damn you, Casey! You have set a curse upon me.

my boys

img1502Jacob 6 months
Originally uploaded by rangerrina.

My husband and my son get along great. They make each other laugh. They share a love of me... and television. They both have blue eyes and great smiles. They love the camera and are both tall for their age. They also like to grab my hair occasionally.

UP LATE

3 days before my son was born

img0814jacob arrives 2004
Originally uploaded by rangerrina.

My Step Sister has come out as a closet blogger

I didn't even know this world existed. She has been doing this for months, secretly. Well, not so secretly it turns out. She only kept it from her family. I saw a print out of one of her recent blog entries at our parents house. It was funny, well written and a little revealing. I love my sis, but she doesn't open up to me that often. I was excited to hear all about this online diary thingy she's been doing. I went home the next night and read through as much as I could before I had to force sleep upon myself. I'm hooked. I feel like I know her a little bit better now and look forward to reading more and more. Thanks Casey! I love you!!!